the girl i could not understand

(1)

it was our anniversary. he had gifted me imported chocolates. at the red light, in between kisses and chocolates intruded a voice... a ragged creature with a stained face asking for my chocolates, offering to bless me in exchange. i hated her then although i threw out the chocolates. i saw her licking her fingers afterward.

(2)

cool breeze, perfumed air we five friends are trying on mehendi its eleven in the night, but this is a posh locality shiela dixit will ensure our security and then a urgent pressure on my hands "buy my roses, didi, do buy my roses" i shrink from the touch i shoo her away she keeps coming back with her near wailing cry, her desperation evident in her pleading. i look at her a stone cold set face, hardened beyond any feeling

(3) yesterday i saw her she was staring out at me

from a rembrandt painting.

loss

Last night i dreamt of him

We were in a temple

The idols were covered

But the lamps were lit

The idol blessed us—

With blindness.

Today i woke up lost

... my paradise already lost.

the moon and the cactus

The moon fell in love with the cactus

The cactus refused to embrace him

The moon languished away...

...A fortnight and it revived.

 

But the cactus!!?

She pined away.

conversation

Words convey loss of meaning

Mutilation of truth

Silently she believed

The promises made in words

So the lover she embraces in bed today 

Is the Oxford English Dictionary.

(there even "silence" is expressed in words!!)

love

I worship a stone idol.

I married him when i was a child.

Now i weep blood,

I carry stones in my womb.

I die a virgin every night.